Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
