Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize