Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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