haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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