I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
