This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
