I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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