My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
