I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
We left the knife in your bed.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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