Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
