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Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
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