There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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