I wannas sexs uuuuu
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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