Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Randomize
