Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize