So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
BRING THE BAGELS
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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