I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize