I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
