Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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