I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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