How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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