whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
