So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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