Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
