Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
