yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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