Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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