3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
it's like heaven, but drunker
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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