if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize