my mouth tastes like poor choices
well you can't waste a boner
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
