i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Help me help you realize you are a moron
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
