Life is so much better after having sex.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
