Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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