glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
A bitchslap is in order.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
