i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I'm getting married
To pizza
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
