I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize