Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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