i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
