I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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