Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Randomize
