I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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