she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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