thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
