Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
