he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
