I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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