Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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