Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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