we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
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