IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
