You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
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